Our Quest to change our lives began in Feb. 2010 and we lost 224 lbs. This is the story of our continuing Journey through the ups and downs of maintenance.
(For the fullest effect, begin at the beginning in Feb. 2010 using our Blog Archive on sidebar)

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Did I do my VIRTUAL RUN Today?

Last night was another one of our women’s basketball games.  I get way excited to play.  I love to pump it up and really do my best.  I LOVE IT!!  I run, I get hot, I try to make baskets, I try to steal the ball.... it’s so dang FUN!
Brent and my daughter came to watch.  The other team didn’t show up (so they forfeited and we won) so we just played each other on a 4:4 team still full court.
Rowr!!  We Yo Mama's!!  I'm second to the end on right
I can’t even type this without tears coming to my eyes - it’s hard to express what it means to me to have my husband and daughter watch me play.  Because more than anyone else in that building THEY know what it’s taken for me to get here. THEY know what it means for me to play.  I am making up for lost years here.  YEARS!
Even though I’m not the best of players... my heart is so in it and I feel so alive playing.  When I can run down that court on a fast break and I’m the first one to the basket, or when I guard another player and I can keep up with her and stop her from scoring... I feel like a WINNER.  Because I could NOT have done that for so many years.  It means so much to me to have my husband and daughter proud of me.  No one else there may have had any clue what it meant... but for me - it’s FREEDOM FROM BONDAGE!
After the game, my friend and I took our daughters and splurged on some frozen yogurt.  We definitely had burned enough calories and earned that splurge (that is our reasoning and we stand by it)  No toppings, just the yogurt.  It was a great memory.
Yes, I'm wearing my really extra big jacket - trying to keep extra warm :)
Soooo... this morning was my VIRTUAL RUN for  Tori's Febtastic 1st Annual Virtual fun Run/Walk for February.  I laid in bed for a long time... seems to be a pattern when I almost psyche myself out of things, but eventually I got out of that bed and literally raced out of the house before I could change my mind.
Threw on my jogging out fit and just about to head out the door!
As I got down the street, I realized I DID NOT have my knee braces on.  Dang!  Hope my knees don’t get sore - as this is going to be a longer run!  
It was cold but clear and I had this gorgeous mountain range all around me... the view was incredible as I ran and the music kept me going.  I would punch out during certain parts of the songs.  I had the Star Wars Darth Vader theme music come on my ipod... and I couldn’t help but raise my hand up to the sides like I was using the force to move things, and then breath out and I sounded just like Vader. It felt powerful!  I smiled as I thought about anyone peeking out their window laughing at me.  Oh well, dork is me.  It felt cool!
What amazed me is how good I felt running.  Maybe it was just being outside this time!  I took my pace SLOW and STEADY.  I didn’t even look at my watch until over 30 minutes has passed.  I had lots to think about and discuss in my head with Heavenly Father.  I felt such gratitude that He gave me this body and that I could run.  I felt grateful for the strength He gave me so I could.  At one point, my hair bangs kept falling down over my face annoying me and as I wished they would stay out of my face - just then, a cool breeze came and blew them back out of my way and gave me a nice cool feel on my face.  I knew it was a little gift from HIM... He cares even about those tiny things. 
So even though I was running alone when I preferred to have a buddy, it’s like I was RUNNING with ANGELS and I wasn’t alone!  Maybe those angels were my wonderful parents.  Being on the other side, they can see that bigger picture and they know the path I’ve traveled and how hard it's been for me.  THEY KNOW.  They LOVE me!   It makes me smile to think they may watch me or be angels that run with me.  I don’t know if that is true, but I do know that I WASN’T ALONE.
I ran a ways down a long pathway that leads out of our valley then I came all the way back.  I did start to tire after an hour but I was determined to get all the way back to my house.  Towards the end it was just about enduring and my eyes were pretty much on the path just a few feet ahead.
I made it home and right into my husbands arms.  He had tried riding his bike to find me but never did.
I pulled out my pedometer to see that
 I had run 5.35 MILES!!
I’ve never run that far or long in my lifetime yet.  
I ran for 1 hour and 25 minutes straight without stopping.  
I was hoping to just run over 1 hour and possibly 4 miles... I am so pleased to have beaten my own goal!  
AND my knees are not overly sore.  
What a blessing!
It amazes me what a person can do that we don’t realize we can do.  Maybe we focus way too much energy and thoughts on our mistakes and failures that we don’t realize that our potential is UNLIMITED and a million times more than we know!  Maybe we should focus more attention to what we want to DO or ACHIEVE instead of all the mistakes and obstacles along the way. 
DISTRACTION can be our enemy... especially those negative thinking ones that serve no good purpose!  I am still learning this.  I am still trying to NOT get distracted by self-doubt, fear, loneliness, or laziness... but to realize I CAN DO IT.  

I’ve been saying to myself every time I start a run,“It’s not that hard, you can do this - you’ve done this before” and that’s been helping me not to go into thinking how hard it is and that I want to stop.  
“It’s not that hard - I can do this - I’ve done this before”.  
Words can have such power.
Whatever you have before you - I hope you can CONQUER yourself and JUST DO IT!  
You CAN DO IT!  
Focus on that end result and IGNORE the mistakes along the way.
Life is GOOD 
xoxoxo ~Margene


Karla said...

You are an amazing lady!!!!

Kimberlynn said...

Wooohooo!!! Way to go Margene. I just love the part about "dork is me". You're such a funny, beautiful, and inspiring person...I love you friend!

Love and blessings

E. Jane said...

Yay for you, Margene! You are amazing, and I am so happy for you and inspired by you!!!

dawne said...

Totally amazing. I loved that the thought of playing basketball brings tears to your eyes. I love that you haven't forgotten how far you've come.

Rettakat said...

What a wonderful post to read! How far you've come, and your awareness and gratitude for that.

And I learning, too, how powerful it is when I say encouraging words to myself! Fantastic reminder, and thank you for sharing where you are at on this journey, it's so uplifting to read. :-)

Joy said...

You are so inspiring!! The part about the breeze and your bangs got me!! God is so good!!! You have come so far my Friend!! Really excited for you!!

You have really been on my mind lately and I went to call you, but your number was not on my phone. Could you call me sometime? I would love to talk with you!!

Love and hugs!!

Keep focused!

A Journey to a new me... said...

YOu are AMAZING...but I've known that for a while now! It's a wonderful feeling to be free from the bonds that held us down for so long. Congrats on making a new record--awesome awesome awesome!! hugs

Julie said...

I am so proud of you Margene!!! WOW are you one super amazing person. WOW!!!! Just plain wow. Keep up the great work. I love reading what you're going. basketball and running and family and so much more!!
Blessings my friend!!

Sandrelle said...

GREAT job!!! You are a supa-woman! ;)