I’ve been avoiding writing here in my blog. I keep thinking that I will share things when I really get a grasp on it. Yet do we ever get a grasp on it? It’s the journey, I suppose. In my journey, I have been SO blessed. But it is also SO hard. Like I’m sure it is for everyone. I have been experiencing times of eating good and times of making bad food choices. I am now 15 pounds heavier than my goal and I do not like that. I do NOT want to gain my weight back. I do NOT want to go back into a negative, self-loathing state. I am in a new place and a new environment and I have to work HARDER now to keep the positive momentum I started. I had so much motivation in Oregon and here I find myself stumbling to find my motivation. I am new. I am unknown. I am isolated. But I don’t have to stay that way. One of my Oregon friends reminded me a while ago that I am not unknown to Him (Jesus Christ). I am not forgotten by Him. And she is right. It is through my Savior that I was able to reach the unimaginable goal of losing my weight. I cannot ever forget that! And it is through Him also that I will keep this weight off and not get drawn back into a life of sadness and sorrow and self-hating.
I went to a women’s fireside this morning and heard a mother/daughter speak and sing to us about their trials and faith. Their story was amazing and inspiring and I found myself weeping. One thought that the daughter shared was that our suffering comes from seeking our will over God’s. That following God’s will won’t take our pain away but it will take away our suffering. I’ve also thought about the concept that when we suffer, it can mean that we need to repent. I first talked about in the first weeks of my journey back in this post. At first that sounds preposterous because it isn’t always our fault when we are made to suffer. Yet maybe it’s our lack of not forgiving someone else, or not handling a situation as we know God would want us to that makes us suffer. There is still so much pondering on that I need to do.
A friend sent this Youtube link. It was everything I needed to hear set to some beautiful music and I’m so thankful she sent it. I’ve watched it several times and written the words down so I can remember them. Although these are words from a leader of my Faith, I think someone may also be needing to hear these words and be inspired as I was.
What does all this have to do with health and weight loss? For my journey, it has everything to do with it. Because my journey has been one of letting go my will and turning to my Savior and submitting to His will. Miracles have happened in my life because I have turned to Him. It’s about changing me on the inside as well as the outside. I know that I NEED HIS help to do this!
A couple fun things to share. We had a fun time with family at the park the other day. I love being closer to my sister and sister-inlaw. I even practiced playing baseball for the first time in years the and I can still hit a ball pretty far! It was way fun.
Also, Brent and I rode our bikes for a 10K the other night and I didn’t even break a sweat. That felt good.
And, we had some good friends from Oregon visit us just yesterday... our first to do so! We had dinner and played games and laughed a lot. We were overjoyed to see them... and I secretly wanted them to stay for several days. It was so nice to see their friendly faces from our Oregon “home”. Life is good!
