Why keep poison in my mind and body?

Hello!  

Happy September!!!!!

Kids are in school, life is getting a little more consistent.  YES!

Okay, hard lesson learned lately:

Recently, I've had a situation where I was involved in a service of doing something nice for a friend. And in the course of my work on this, some negative words and accusations were said to me.  Some things were said to me and other hurtful things were said about me personally behind my back.  This was all  done by people I thought would have "had my back" so to speak. 

This put a huge negative spin on the whole positive thing I was trying to do and I found myself going through all the reasons why this was so completely unfair and rude, even a blatant betrayal. 

Yes, I felt anger, and sadness, and loss. 

I thought everyone involved was actually my friend.  So now, with their tendency to judge and criticize me, I felt that they were not really friends after all. So in my mind I lost friendships. 

UG! And then I let this dampen the super nice thing I was doing for a friend to begin with. 

---- Big Sigh ----

It is so easy to see how I was not in the wrong.
 I was the one actually doing something NICE.

YET... 

how I handle this can put me in the wrong. 

It's like it's all a TEST. 

Maybe the question in mind isn't if my friends are true friends, but really: 

What kind of "Friend" am I? 

One of the main people in question - I confronted and we actually talked it out. 

 This person gave me a sincere apology for their part in what happened. 

So it should have been done, right? 

Yet I found myself still mulling over things and thinking of things to get upset over
and kind of "renewed" that feeling of how "out of line" others were. 

How SO rude this was. 

How I want nothing more to do with people like that! 

How sick I am of reaching out SOOOO often in friendship and love and that is what I get! 

I spent a week in anguish, hurt, and sadness. I cried, I didn't go out.  

I felt so angry and sorry for myself. That's a week of my life I can't get back. 

What's funny, is I KNOW what will bring me peace in all this. 

(Okay, not really funny because I'm not laughing... but ya know)

I KNOW it's not confronting everyone who was rude; it's not isolating myself from everyone that is going to ease my soul. I KNOW that I have to LET GO and truly FORGIVE them. I need to let God deal with it, and let it drift away from my soul. 

And THEN I won't have the pain and anguish. 

THEN I can be FREE. 

If I really think of myself and GET REAL with all that I've ever said and done, I know that I have made mistakes and hurt others. I've done things that were unfair. Maybe not this same thing - but really, who am I to feel that I'm a saint and others aren't? 

I even knew that if I prayed specifically about this, 

I KNEW that the prompting I would feel would be to forgive and let it go. 

Why keep poison in my mind and body? 

It only harms me. 

So it's been a humbling experience. 

I am now working on forgiving and letting it go. 

I want to remember the good that came from the service and look back with a smile. 

 I know that it's Christ's atonement that wipes all that negative and pain away for REALS. 

I will be quicker to forgive and let go the next time I'm given the opportunity. 

And what does this have to do with health and eating? 

To me, it's everything! 

When I am being REAL with myself in the areas of needing to forgive. 

 I find that I'm also being REAL with myself in acknowledging that I need to make better health choices. 

I've said this before, but I truly feel that my physical and mental health is directly tied to my Spiritual health and my relationship with my high power! When I grow distant from God, it becomes harder to forgive others, to make better eating choices, and to have a clear mind in seeing truth. 

For me, being closer to God and seeking His Spirit
helps me be empowered over my life and my thoughts.

Life is GOOD

XoxoXO ~Margene

Thanksgiving and Letting Go

It was sweet and simple. Just our family. Simple delicious food. Lots of rest and lounging. Then a jaunt to the movie "Megamind" at the theater later on. Nice. Lovely. Quiet.

I tried brining my turkey this time, and it was so tender, moist and delicious. My daughter helped me form some Rhodes dough into rolls and they rose overnight (they got so big!). For the kids I had the rolls, gravy from a can (since I don’t know how to make my own), and stuffing. We also had roasted Veggies.

We snapped a couple of pics. I love how I can sit on My Man's lap now... and not destroy him in the process!

I stayed on plan... But I did eat a little more than 6 ounces of turkey breast... it was so good! I also snitched a couple bites of the cooked carrots that were under the turkey in all that yummy juice. They were so good. Carrots are not on plan right now but I will add them in later. I enjoyed my snitching. No pie. I had my Medifast pumpkin pie pudding (vanilla pudding w/ pumpkin pie spice and cinnamon - Yum!). I also enjoyed some knox blox and crunchy Medifast pretzels in the theater. I did not feel like I missed out on a single thing - food wise at least. :) Wonderful day!

Roasted veggies are my NEW FAVORITE!!

They are so easy.

I cut up the veggies into 1” cubes or so. I used broccoli, Cauliflower, zucchini, and yellow squash. Toss with olive oil and sprinkle with sea salt. Bake in middle of the oven at 425 for 12 minutes or so. Take out and flip them over as needed. Bake another 5-8 minutes as needed for that sealed roasted glaze. Then toss with just a splash of balsamic vinegar. SO delish!!!

I was reading yesterday over at Sam’s Believe in yourself blog and her post “It’s time to let go” really spoke to me. I know that letting go is really my theme of this whole journey. I’ve talked about this before especially when I first started back in February. Sam talks about a dream she had and the questions that came to her: Are there things in my heart that need to be set free? Things that daily cause me pain? That cause others pain? Things that cause this to be a painful life?

I have to say YES. I know that the pain and heartache I feel are things I need to let go. I get hung up on my lack of understanding. Why things turn out so differently, what was the purpose of certain events, are hurtful things said to me in the past still true, what is so horrible about me, and my list of questions can go on and on. I’ve recognized my need to let go. To move on. To have faith in my future. Yet, there are those times that a snippet of that heartache pops back into my life and I stumble and fall and fight it all over again. I have this song I love by Michael McLean that’s called “Let it go”. I love to just listen and soak in the words. Here are some of them:

“Letting go, opens up the heart. There is a new day hungry to start. You can’t change what has hurt you so, but you will heal, if you can let it go. All that’s wrong in your life, let it go. All that is worth saving..... is love. Love will hold you tight. Love lifts the burden and love shines the light. Only love nourishes a soul. If it’s not love, simply let it go.”

So Sam talks about letting go and embracing joy. She challenges her readers to find ONE THING to let go for today and to encourage our blog readers to do the same and to think of how much better this world would be if we all removed one of the painful things from our heart and replaced it with a feeling and action of gratitude. Grab this button too, and post about it if ya want! :)

So my one thing to let go of today is my DOUBTS. My doubts in things being positive, doubts in my relationships with others, doubts in truly trusting the Lord. I want to let them GO and replace them with FAITH. Faith in trusting the Lord. Faith that my family and friends are true to me (this is huge), and Faith in things turning out for the best. I know this seems huge, but it boils down to little thoughts.. and I want to LET GO of my little doubtful thoughts that lead me to so much pain. Whoooosh....... gone! Letting them go!

What do you want to let go of today?