EXTREME THINKING and TOXIC PEOPLE

~ I believe this is one of my most important posts ~

I am learning so much about how our journey changes as it goes.
I started this blog to show myself that this time I believed that I could make the changes I wanted to.  

But not only has it been a journey of dropping the number on the scale, but more importantly, for me, it's been the changing of the way I perceive my life and handle life's challenges.  For the first time, I truly believed I could move a mountain in my life.  And with the Lord's help, I did.  My chains are gone, I have been set free!!

I reached my weight loss goal almost a year and a half ago.  My life is completely different today.
Those who know me and have seen me (then and now), can see and feel a difference in me in so many ways, not just physically!  Soon after reaching goal, both Brent and my doctor felt that my goal weight was too low for me.  I settled into a weight about 15 pounds higher than my goal.  Since then, I have worked to find a balance with how I eat and exercise to maintain my goals.  I have admitted that I've gained weight and wanted to shed some pounds.  Yet I have maintained the majority of my weight loss since I reached goal.  Although now, I do not emphasize the number on the scale, because I have the tendency to become too obsessed with that number and then my focus gets off balance.  

Maintenance is about moderation and BALANCE for me.  My blog has changed along with my journey.  I now blog more about what I am learning not only physically, but mentally, emotionally and spiritually as well.    

Here on my blog, readers have complete access to all 58 weeks of my journey in phase 1 of TSFL.  I have a wealth of information of what I went through and what meals I made for my lean and greens and so forth.  And hopefully those in maintenance can find some helpful things from what I am going through now.  Or just follow along for the ride!

I have unfortunately, joined the ranks of some of the finest weight-loss bloggers I know who have had very cruel judgments pointed against them by certain readers.   

I have put my story out in a public blog to be helpful for some, and sometimes that means being criticized by others.   But when my family is attacked, that is crossing the line with me.    

Some people in your life can be Toxic to your overall health. 

It is OKAY to set boundaries for yourself. 

It doesn't mean that a person is bad; 

it means that you need to set a "fence" 

for your own safety and that of your family.

The fact is, most people do not get overweight or obese being emotionally healthy!  

Usually, there are even bigger issues with our emotional health than with our physical health.
Our inside thoughts eventually get manifest by our outward appearance.
This comes through with what we think, turning into what we feel,
turning into how we act and the choices we make.  

Life is NOT black or white. 

People are NOT black or white. 

Extreme thinking is NOT healthy thinking. 

I myself struggled with severe self-loathing.  I thought in the extreme.
Everything that someone said that was remotely negative was seen by me as extremely negative
 and added to my extreme thinking of what a horrible person I was.
It sounds absurd, and it is absurd, but it is a REAL struggle
when you are trapped in this way of thinking.
For me, it's been like climbing out of a deep muddy pit.

It requires one to make NEW PATHWAYS of thought.  

It requires one to HANDLE SITUATIONS differently.  

For me, it's been a lot about trusting in God more.  

It is hard work to change the way you think!
I have come a LONG way. (Just ask my hubs!)
 I don’t handle things the same way I did a few years ago.  

I have learned and I'm still learning: 

* To not get offended so easily. 

* To give the benefit of the doubt more. 

I notice that many people, who judge harsh, 
do so while they remain in their "safe" area 
(not having revealed their own vulnerabilities), 
where those they judge are out in the open.

The problem with our extreme perceptions of people is that eventually we will be disappointed.
And if we don't realize that it was our own PERCEPTION,
we may in fact BLAME the person for our disappointment
instead of acknowledging our own mistake. 

When we have no stewardship over someone (like being their parent)
yet we feel we are in a position to judge someone
and tell them what we think they "need to hear",
(especially when we have such little knowledge of their lives
or haven't even met them in person),
we are inappropriately putting ourselves in a position of too much power.  

We are not here to judge each other

We are ALL in this TOGETHER!  

We need to SUPPORT each other!  

We need to be each other's CHEERLEADERS!  

I think we all are doing the best with what we have.

I am thankful that I have a new lease on life! 

I can run!
I can rock climb!
I can play basketball!
I am 10+ years older than all the ladies I play with,
but I have a lot of lost time to make up for!
And even though I've damaged my knees from all those years of obesity,
right now I can still use them, and I'm so thankful for that.
My planters fasciitis is gone now!
I sleep SOOO much better than I ever did. 

If I have offended anyone who read this blog or this post, I sincerely apologize.
If my blog or story doesn't relate to you --
find blogs or books or whatever it is you need that does motivate you --
and then go for it!
Life is TOO SHORT to wait any longer!
Life is TOO SHORT to worry about what others are doing.
Make YOUR life worth LIVING!

That is all.  Peace out!

~Margene